that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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