Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
