my mouth tastes like poor choices
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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