you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
