break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
