her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
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so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
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I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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