I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
