we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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