I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize