it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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