How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
