I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize