is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
