If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
