i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
