so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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