I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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