I think I died a long time ago.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
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How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
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I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
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