sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize