Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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