Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
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