in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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