she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Best friends brother. Beat that.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
