Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize