If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
pray to the hookup gods
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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