so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
