Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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