I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Randomize
