I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
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