If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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