I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
The feeling are messing with the penis
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
