You're so nebulous sometimes
You can't special order awesome
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
