even my farts smell like vagina
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Randomize
