Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
