At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
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