i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
lets start a swedish sibling band together
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
