he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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