It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
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I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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