IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me