I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
