why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize
