I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
