I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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