so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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