Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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