dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
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Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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