so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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