please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
