Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
