Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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